Forbearance is a secret to a successful life. It is an ability that should be improved as you will meet situations and persons that need you to forbear as a result you will overcome difficulties and deal effectively with others. Linguistically speaking, “forbearance” is the noun of the verb “forebear” that also means to endure and have patience. Thus, forbearance is connected with patience. The more patient a person is, the more he becomes able to forbear. Thus, they become your life companions. Forbearance is said to be an extreme patience .As the poet said,
Be a man and afflictions forbear
Bounty of tolerance and faithfulness do share
Life teaches man to bear affliction, pain or even negative people. He may also exercises forbearance to achieve an aspired goal for the sake of his love. It is the tribute of the powerful as the weak may quickly surrender to problems or retreat after taking the first step toward their goal if they find an obstacle in their way. Forbearance is the outcome of man’s insistence on facing the challenges and reaching goals. For instance, some people toil, exert efforts to learn and improve their abilities to achieve a high position or status in society. Long-suffering and forbearance are embodied in the life of many great people in their journey to success, Gandhi said, “Anger and intolerance are the enemies of correct understanding …”.Great people share the attributes of forbearance, long-suffering in life with all its afflictions and forbearance and sacrifice for the sake of love. Love may be another motive for forbearance and tolerance, for instance, man can forbear or tolerate with others’ provoking behaviors due to his love for them. Parental love is a good example on that. Someone once said that love is not found to bring us happiness, but to show us how forbearing we are. The real evidence of love is forbearance. The main reason for intense fights and arguments is lack of love and inability to forbear others. It is said, winning souls is the result of love, forbearance and patience are the motives of love as they are the signs of a big heart. As The Reposed H.H. Pope Shenouda iii that hardships are hard for heart to bear them, but if you have a big heart you can tolerate anything. A big heart is thankful and joyous all the time no matter what hardships he is going through. Long-suffering increases man’s love, patience, and meekness. As they say “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger” as it adds to your experience, makes you gain positive attributes and motivates you to be more successful. In your hard times, trust that you are not alone, God always supports you if you call on Him and know that if you feel weak sometimes, it’s because you forgot about God’s strength that supports you. Have strength as life is changeable and everything will come to an end. It is not stormy all the time. Night will be followed by dawn, spring comes after winter. Thus, forbearance is your path to success.
Anba Ermiah, General Bishop& President of the Coptic Orthodox Cultural Center