We dealt with honesty and its aspects. Today we are going to tackle honest advice and how we should offer it to help others change their ways, yet without hurting their feelings. Honest advice is the better expression of man’s love to his fellow man and to God, the Most Gracious. You should be honest to all people as honesty is an action not a reaction. A wise man once said you should be true to the honest and dishonest. Thus, honesty prevails. You should be sure of what you are saying. “It is a fine thing to be honest, but it is also very important to be right.”-Churchill. Solomon the wise says, “There is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death”. You should warn or advise others in a gentle way. To explain more, there is a story about a young man who was admiring his friend so much that he was imitating all his actions and wearing the same clothes as him. His friend was not a good man and many warned him about that. However, he never listened. Once, his wise father decided to warn him about that. He tried to advise him gently using symbols. He asked, “Would you prefer to see yourself in a broken or a whole mirror?” “A whole, of course, as the broken mirror would not reflect a real image of me, it would misguide me”, answered the boy. Thus the father answered, “My son, your friend resembles a mirror, if he was good, he would help you to see your faults and warn you if you go astray. However, if he is not a good person, he would mislead you”.
An honest person would haste to save those destroying themselves; however he would choose his words carefully lest he hurt their feelings. Furthermore, he would proclaim the truth honestly yet gently. You can not hurt people’s feeling for the false cause of being honest as no one is perfect.
“The Emperor’s New Clothes” is a short tale by Hans Christian Andersen about two weavers who promised an emperor a new suit of clothes that they said is invisible to those who are unfit for their positions, stupid, or incompetent. He was so happy that he would wear magical clothes and would be able to discover those who are unfit for their positions. He never thought that the weavers were deceiving him. Time went by and the emperor sent his minister to check on the weavers’ work. The minister saw no clothes; however he was afraid that he might appear unfit for his position if he told the emperor so. Thus, he lied saying that the work went fine and that it was the best clothes he had ever seen; so did all who were sent by the emperor to check on the weavers. Even when the emperor went in person to check on their work, he was unable to see the clothes, yet he did not say that lest he appear unfit for his position. When the Emperor paraded before his subjects in his new clothes, no one dared to say that they did not see any suit of clothes on him for fear that they would be seen as “unfit for their positions, stupid, or incompetent”. Finally, a child cried out, “But he isn’t wearing anything at all!”Hereby the entire crowd became attentive that the emperor was naked.
General Bishop
Head of the Coptic Orthodox Cultural Center
