Churchill says “Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.” In the previous article we tackled the issue of criticism. To be open to criticism indicates that you are a broad-minded person enough to realize the benefits of criticism and the use you can get out of it if you take it objectively without judging the adviser’s personality. We also have dealt with the benefits of constructive criticism and its role in developing one’s character.
Destructive criticism:
One can define the destructive criticism that it is any criticism that that doesn’t aim for someone’s good; nevertheless its object is ruining others. Sometimes to ruin someone, one don’t have to chase his mistakes only, some may hide the demerits of someone’s work or his mistakes deceiving him that he can’t do any better. It is a disguised criticism or false praise. It is more dangerous than destructive criticism that focuses on the negative points only. Moreover, it is the easiest ways to ruin a person. Thus, unstoppable praise and constant criticism are two sides of the same coin “Running the others”.
One may find it a puzzling matter, but let us think objectively would any person try to improve the quality of his work if he thought that it is void of demerits? Had a person thought his work is perfect, he would never try to be better. Thus he would not try to achieve greater success, stop growing up and retreat back. Change is the basic rule of life. People won’t stop growing up. So, my friend, not all what you consider praise is a sign of love. Maybe some simple notes about your negative traits would be more sincere and deeper in love than applaud and curry favor. It brought to my mind the story of the old king who tested his daughters’ love by the eloquence of their expressions toward him. Accordingly, he distributed his kingdom into portions. The elder girl competed with the middle girl in showing love for their father while the youngest expressed her love in plain and honest words; however she carried the most portion of love toward her father. Alas, her father refused her simple love and thus the result was her destruction and eventually his too. It is the story of King Leer, one of Shakespeare’s masterpieces.
The other sort of criticism is the easily noticed one that focuses on mistakes. However, the clearest sign of the destructive criticism is that it tackles the person himself and not his mistakes. It also doesn’t care about a person’s feelings and devalue any good deed a person does. The destructive criticizer insists on criticizing a person in public to embarrass him and sometimes it turns to defamation. One should be alert to the two sides of destructive criticism and think carefully of them searching deeper in his soul for the truth. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man that is in him so do true friends who truly and sincerely know and love him. Remember, dear reader, “Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.” – Frank A. Clark
Anba Ermia
General Bishop
Head of the Coptic Orthodox Cultural Center
